Sunday, December 14, 2014

Christmas Math

Growing up in St. Louis, Missouri,  I've learned that there are supposed to be four distinct seasons. Winter, Spring, Summer, and Fall. Or Autumn. Whatever.

Therefore, the equations to the division of these seasons are as follows:

Rain+Warmth+Humidity= Spring
Heat+Sun= Summer
Cool+Falling Leaves= Fall/Autumn

So According to these equations, Cold+Ice+Snow=Winter

I also know that Winter=Christmas=Happy=U=Presents=Holidays(if Christmas offends you, although I have no idea why an excuse to put off work longer would offend you.)

Being in Texas raises an issue to this mathematical phenomenon. See if Cold+Snow=Winter=Christmas=Happy=U=Presents then we can't have Christmas. It is in the mid sixties for temperature. That is not Cold, therefore it is not Winter or Happy or Christmas or U or Presents.

So when someone sings "Where are U Christmas? Why can I find U?" It's because it is too warm and there is no Snow. Or even Ice.

But, Christmas could be totally dependent on something other than the weather. What would I know? I suck at math AND I have no social life.

What do you think?

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